Muscular But Jobless: Challenges, Factors Behind Domestic Violence In Homes And How To Curb The Rising Toxicity
The Oasis Reporters
March 27, 2025
Sadness usually fills parents and in-laws of married couples each time they visit special police or Court premises that deal with not only intimate partner violence but domestic violence in all it’s ramifications because even anger and extreme violence in troubled families does flow not only to children too, but visitors, and in some cases bystanders that try to intervene in suing for peace whenever batterings occur.
The problem of troubled families is so overwhelming that there are now dedicated desks in almost all states to deal with the issue.
Take for instance in 2021, then Edo State Governor, Mr. Godwin Obaseki in Benin City, signed into law the Violence Against Persons Prohibition Law 2021 as Amended (VAPPL).
The governor also inaugurated a 24-man Committee of Edo State Gender and Sexual Based Violence Management Committee (EDO-GBV) and a 24-man Committee on Gender Based Violence Technical Working Group, with a charge to end violence-based crimes in the state.
Obaseki then disclosed that Governors across the country have made a commitment to support and take as priority, issues related to gender-based violence in the country.
According to him, “As a state, we have domesticated the Violence Against Persons Prohibition Law 2019 in the State as amended. It is aimed at eliminating violence in private and public life, prohibiting all forms of violence against persons and providing maximum protection and effective remedies for victims, as well as punish offenders of gender-based violence.”
That shows how serious domestic issues are to attract the government’s attention.
While the society is angry over incessant cases of domestic violence leading to separations and divorce to avoid death, little attention is being paid to the actual causative factors beyond the narration by the combatants in the house.
Most times, the key driver is the economy, and the changing roles in it.
In most homes, the men who pummel their wives, children, house helps with anger and extreme violence are more often than not, fighting change in the economy that has left them behind.
In the past, starting from the hunter gatherer age, to the industrial age and even into the knowledge economy age, muscular men were favoured. And the men would often assume the role of father and provider, taking care of the household and he was lord.
But there have been further changes. The world is now in the information age.
And with the information age, there has been a turning of systems, conventions, attitudes, new economic productivity styles unlocking wealth etc that are not only gender neutral, but many seem to favour the feminine gender more like in this current digital economy that is all inviting.
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Therefore most men from the “old economy” find it extremely difficult and their relationship to the new economy is still struggling, caught between the old and the new, as the replacement of the 20th century industrial economy with an economy dominated by information and information-intensive services has seen most women in the high revenue bracket.
The results are evident in the labour market. First, the decline in the relative share of the male-dominated manual occupations has been reflected in a gradual convergence in the labour force participation rates of men (declining) and women (increasing), according to John Quiggin, a Professor at School of Economics, The University of Queensland.
Most men unfortunately find themselves operating less in the new economy. Women have mostly become breadwinners while the husband hangs around, doing little or doing nothing deep.
In his frustration, he descends on his wife and children at any little provocation. He wants the old respect and order of things back. But this is likely going to be a bit stressful.
Angry and frustrated, most women run to the law. In the end, separation and alienation becomes hauntingly possible because such toxic situations in homes have been known to lead to even murder of the spouse as Nigerians have seen in the case of the late gospel Singer, Osinachi Nwachukwu.
So the news circulating on Instagram now is that Osinachi Nwachukwu did not die of throat Vnvwe like some blogs have been saying rather she has been in an Abusive Marriage and was severely beaten to Coma by her Husband. This is so sad… Is her church aware of this? pic.twitter.com/G44p6HsFTP
— Peter Obi's Akwa Nwa (@Shizzlemajizzle) April 9, 2022
In 2021, Africa was deeply saddened when sensational Kenyan athlete and world record holder, Agnes Tirop was found stabbed to death at her home in the western town of Iten in Kenya.
The fact that the police arrested her husband in connection with the death brought the subject of domestic violence to the fore in Kenyan discourse. Population and reproductive health researcher Yohannes Dibaba Wado shares his insights into how widespread it is and what must be done to address it.
Something has to be done towards ending
intimate partner violence.
The World Health Organization (WHO) estimates that almost one third of women experience some form of physical and or sexual violence from an intimate partner in their lifetime. According to the WHO, as many as 38% of all murders of women are committed by intimate partners.
In Kenya, according to the most recent national data (which was published in 2014), overall, about 41% of women reported having experienced physical or sexual violence from their husbands or partners in their lifetime. About two-fifths of those women reported physical injuries from the violence.
The 2014 Kenya Demographic and Health Survey indicated that about one in four women reported physical or sexual violence from a partner in the 12 months before the survey. This means it could be more prevalent and widespread than thought.
These steps are all needed, and all important. Something has to shift in order to protect women and girls from this violence.
A police spokesperson once shared a piece of information in Nigeria that should a woman die after a fight with her spouse within one year and one day, it would be assumed that it was the fight that killed her.
The man would face the death penalty.
It is therefore advisable not to engage in any form of fisticuffs at home. Talking every challenge out is much better.
Living in peace is preferable, even if the man has not paid school fees once for the children in more than 20 years. Anything can change in the economy at any time. And the women should try to be more tolerant in order to live in harmony no matter the economic situation.
Greg Abolo
gregabolo@gmail.com
